Being the best Dawnita I was Created to Be
26 November 2018
Black Swallowtail Caterpillar
Three months ago, I was spinning my wheels. If I am being completely honest, I had been spinning my wheels for years—decades even. And, in case you did not already know this, spinning your wheels takes lots of effort. I would try doing some of this and some of that, because those are the things they tell you to do when you are stuck. There were days when I thought I was finally getting somewhere only to find myself mired down again. I read the books, watched the videos, took the classes, and closely observed those who were not stuck. They all offered me great advice, but their advice always seemed to be just short of what I needed. Anyone with me on this?
I think it was sheer stubbornness that kept me trying time after time, but even the stubborn people wear out. I was so tired of trying and failing that I was to the point of quitting. The only thing that was keeping me going was the feeling that if I quit, I would be quitting on something core to what makes me me.
God answers prayers in strange ways sometimes. I have experienced the more conventional and some more unusual ways that He has done this. However, this would be the first time for Him to answer my prayers through a Facebook ad that was posted because of one of those algorithms we all love to hate. So if someone knows the mathematician and the computer geeks responsible for those algorithms, pass on my thanks.
The very last day in July, I was on Facebook wasting time because I needed a break from spinning my wheels. Or maybe, I was making an excuse so I wouldn’t have to put in the effort to spin my wheels…either way, I was wasting time as had become my habit. Though I usually skip past Facebook ads, one caught my eye. It was for a Matt Tommey webinar called, “The Secret Sauce: How to Connect with God to Create and Sell Your Art.” I proceeded with caution. Was this going to be one more webinar, that led to one more sales pitch, that led to one more class, and to one more time of my telling Handsome that we should spend a large chunk of money because I had found the secret to getting out of the mud pit, only to be disappointed one more time. I wasn’t sure I had another “one more time” in me, but I decided to proceed with caution. The webinar was free, so what would it hurt? Right?
Fast forward to one hour after the webinar, after signing up to join the Matt Tommey Mentoring program, my email to Handsome stated, “Mentally, I am pumped! I just finished the webinar and not only is it what I have been looking for, in some ways it is what I dream of providing…His fusion of Artist, Spiritual, and Business is exactly what I have been trying to articulate and find for quite some time now.” I was hooked and ready to start moving out of the mud pit.
Black Swallowtail Butterfly
So what makes me so excited about this mentoring program, that I was determined not to join? It is that I finally found the answer and it isn’t even a Matt Tommey secret tip; it is God. The reason every other suggestion, class, book, and video always fell short was that it forgot to remind me that I needed to do some foundation work. I needed to renew my mind from the “truths”, aka lies, I had been trying to live by to the Truth that I should be living by.
One of the first things the mentoring program taught me was that I needed to spend time each morning and night doing affirmations. Not, the Bill Murray, “What about Bob?” movie way of doing things…”I feel good. I feel great. I feel wonderful.” (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ErQUYNeYfM) And not the Facebook way, which says through cute memes that “I got this” and uses inspirational pep talks about pulling myself out of the mire. They don’t work. Why? Because I cannot push myself out of the mud. I have been trying that for years. Sure, I can try and it feels good for a bit, but next time I look, I am still stuck in the mud. I am still human. I still mess up. It is still be basing who I think I am on my limited knowledge of myself that is altered by my moods, the weather, people around me, and my hormones. Honestly, I know what a hot mess I am. Trying to build a system of affirmations based on that mess isn’t wise.
Instead, the affirmations that the mentoring program encourages me to do are biblically based with the knowledge that “the only accurate way to understand ourselves is by what God is and by what He does for us, not by what we are and what we do for Him.” (Romans 12:3 MSG) As a matter of fact, this was one of my first affirmations. “I am best understood based on who God is and what God does. Not by who I am, who I think I am, what I do, who I do it for, or who others think I am.” I have sense collected several affirmations. Some were given to me by my pastor, who happened to preach on this about two weeks after I started doing affirmations, and some come from my Bible study time. I have included a link to the list of affirmations I use, but I encourage you to write some of your own based on what God teaches you in your Bible study time. My advice is to keep them short, start them with “I am”, and double check that you are writing down what God is actually saying, not what you want Him to say. Remember, you aren’t make up your own pep talk. You are recording a Truth that existed before you were created and will exist long after you are gone.
The great thing about doing affirmations this way is that it is not based on the moving target of me and what is important to me at the moment. It is based on who God is, who God says I am, and what God does for me. Those things never change. Besides, what can be greater than sitting in your Daddy’s lap every morning and every night, having life-affirming Truths said in blessing over you? This is also why I do my affirmations last thing before I go to sleep and first thing when I wake up. Most of the time, I am laying in the bed and using my book lamp or the bedside lamp to read them. I try to say them out loud, but often I am so tired that my voice is not working at that point.
Black Swallowtail Butterfly
It has been almost three months now of doing daily affirmations and oh the difference that it has made. I am starting to believe the real Truth and that is very freeing. Being me doesn’t seem so disappointing. I am able to accomplish so much more, now. I did not realize how often I was being held back because I was trying to be my definition of me instead of God’s definition of me. When I realized that I can lean into who God created me to be and that He is for me, not against me, it was life changing. I am no longer spinning my wheels deeper into the mud. I am blazing new paths to unknown destinations that God has written in my book before I was even born. I am now free to be the best Dawnita God created me to be! WooHoo!
I hope that you too are encouraged to start using daily affirmations. You will be surprised at the impact taking a few minutes each day to renew your mind can have. I challenge you to pick five of the affirmations from the affirmation list I provided. Say them morning and night for one week. Then evaluate if this is something that God can use in your life. It is my prayer, that if you raised your hand and said you were with me after reading paragraph one that you can now raise your hand and say you are with me after reading this paragraph. It is my hope and desire that you too can feel the freedom of being the best you that God created you to be.
Link to: Daily Affirmations